I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
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