Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
