Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
