Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
