is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I need water and some morals
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
