Sponge bath it is.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize