I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Randomize
