your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize