I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
