were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
