i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
