census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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