I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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