when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
