i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
