i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize