i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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