I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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