It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
