Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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