no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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