There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
