We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Just invented taco cereal.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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