I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
