It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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