I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We have started to decorate penises.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
