Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
