I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
