i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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