it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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