well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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