my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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