You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
We are two peas in an std pod
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
