Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I love you. Go after that dick
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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