his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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