ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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