That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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