You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
