For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize