Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
