well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
