I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize