No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
