guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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