what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.