im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
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I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
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She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.