Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(626): View more from California

i need an iv and a liver transplant

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(626): i need an iv and a liver transplant http://tfl.nu/lbut

Replies (4) Good night (2477) Bad night (856)
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(862): View more from New Jersey

textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me

(973): View more from New Jersey

that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.

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(862): textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me (973): that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world. http://tfl.nu/8ia3

Replies (27) Good night (806) Bad night (2359)
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(253): View more from Washington

Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.

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(253): Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life. http://tfl.nu/h3s9

Replies (33) Good night (4893) Bad night (1248)
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(516): View more from New York

The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"

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(516): The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse" http://tfl.nu/y3e0

Replies (10) Good night (5185) Bad night (820)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.

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(610): Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand. http://tfl.nu/ms96

Replies (10) Good night (4436) Bad night (1222)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"

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(215): Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober" http://tfl.nu/vzc2

Replies (6) Good night (4057) Bad night (802)
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(708): View more from Illinois

He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..

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(708): He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam.. http://tfl.nu/opqs

Replies (30) Good night (3346) Bad night (2185)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.

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(608): NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN. http://tfl.nu/icmx

Replies (11) Good night (2012) Bad night (891)
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(703): View more from Virginia

You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.

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(703): You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter. http://tfl.nu/b2tf

Replies (4) Good night (2614) Bad night (802)
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(331): View more from Illinois

My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.

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(331): My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good. http://tfl.nu/opzi

Replies (17) Good night (5308) Bad night (706)
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(519): View more from Ontario

Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing

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(519): Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing http://tfl.nu/fucl

Replies (4) Good night (470) Bad night (2046)
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(740): View more from Ohio

I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.

(1-740): View more from Ohio

Are you at a park?

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(740): I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS. (1-740): Are you at a park? http://tfl.nu/nmnn

Replies (2) Good night (591) Bad night (199)
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(952): View more from Minnesota

FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY

(618): View more from Illinois

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?

(952): View more from Minnesota

The D is nonnegotable.

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(952): FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY (618): CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3? (952): The D is nonnegotable. http://tfl.nu/i957

Replies (4) Good night (866) Bad night (232)
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(607): View more from New York

I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it

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(607): I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it http://tfl.nu/h8wz

Replies (2) Good night (497) Bad night (242)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach

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(717): Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach http://tfl.nu/vivy

Replies (2) Good night (694) Bad night (117)

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