I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
