I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
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the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I'm really busy with my period
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