so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.