dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I feel great
I just peed on a car
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
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She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
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he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says