I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I need to calm my uterus...
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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