Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
the night ended with taco bell and tears
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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