we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
