all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
