if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize
