Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
